Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The Worst Part...

Posted by Leslie at 3:26 AM
... of having a preemie baby in the NICU is the uncertainty that goes along with it. I am becoming more confident that I am bringing my baby home at the end of this experience, but I am always worried about other things: will that baby be healthy? Will he having anything wrong with him because of his prematurity? What is going to happen with his suspected CHD? Are his eyes okay? His brain? Everything?? I can sometimes feel the walls closing in on me with different worries about my son? I am happy he is doing well, I guess I just glance up into the sky waiting to see that other shoe drop down from the clouds. I struggle with trying to be positive already in my life. Having this to face with that.. it's daunting. I try to take it one day at a time. I savor every second I have with my son. He is my son & I love him no matter what. I will love him til the end of time & beyond. Nothing can ever change that.

I don't have much else to say other than that. I'll be glad to have a moment where I don't have worry. I'm exhausted from worry.

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